Cougann's, play practices, surgery & choc milk

So not to beat a dead horse...but Cougann tryouts are next Friday!!! I have gone through so many emotions about this. From "she may not make it" to "she will definately make it" and then don't even get me started on the "what ifs" All I know is that she really wants it. She has worked really hard and has now brought her grade point average to a 3.3 so who knows. Teacher evaluations makes up some of the points on the try outs. Granted she screwed up in class but she always manages to realize her screw up...with some help from me...and turn it around. I don't know how the teachers will rate her. Some may hold resentment and state that she is unresponsible...but then some may see that she is hard working and does do good work. Damn this is stress. Results are at 7 p.m. next Friday the 31st ....so I will let everyone know. Is it petty to ask for a little prayer?

This week has been pretty hectic. Play practices every night. Megs is in the junior high production of "Once Upon a Matress". If anyone would like to see the play it will be playing April 1st at the junior high. I think it will be a great play...a really big group of kids and many of them are really talented. I am kinda upset that Meg didn't get the part she was going for....since one of the teachers and all of the kids said she should get it....but with try outs next week and all next week is performance week for the play maybe it was for the best. All of the elementary schools come and watch the play. So by Saturday night...they should have it down!! I am really happy that my dad will be here and able to see it. Meg is nervous about that. She is also nervous for my dad to meet Keifer. I wouldv'e thought she wouldv'e been more nervous for him to meet her dad...but whatever.

As for the surgery....went to the ortho and he said "guess what! your teeth are straight, but the braces aren't going to help the overbite and if we take the braces off...overbite will still be there, so I recommend surgery" Damn. Those are not the words I want to hear. Jaw surgery is not fun. Chris had it about 7 or 8 years ago...upper and lower. Which mine would only be the upper I think...but still it is a 2 day hospital stay and then Chris said he was literally on pain pills and not even knowing that he was alive for 10 days. Then his jaw was wired shut...not sure if mine will be...although if it is weight loss may be a good thing. Now the surgery doesn't scare me...okay maybe a bit....the scary part in all of this is...WHO WILL DO MY JOB??? Who will file the insurance so that the money continues to come in.? Who will do the day sheets and post everything? Not to mention, Who will watch my kids??? So a bunch of worries and thinking. I guess I will have time though the surgeon couldn't get me into his office until May!! Really don't want to do this in the summer. Or early fall since we have Disney in October. No fun. I swear I would have 10 more children than have to go through this!!!

Now for the choc milk. This morning Griffin, not wanting to wake me, tried to pour his own choc milk into his bottle...don't start on me with the bottle!! He choose to do this big boy thing right on my living room carpet!! Oh yeah, did I mention I had my carpets professionally cleaned on TUESDAY!!! I was sooooo angry!! I yelled and said he was a bad boy and he just sat down cried and said "not a bad boy momma" which made me feel like shit. Then Chris comes out and is like "I don't see why you are so mad" I am thinking of the $ 270 bucks I just paid to have the carpets clean for 2 freaking days!!! I know he was just trying to be a big boy and I am proud of him for being independant....but come on...throw me a freaking bone here!!

Either way...really looking forward to crop night at Jeri's. Need to get away from children, house, etc. Only wish we could drink....don't check my big cup....who knows what will be inside!!!

A blog rip off

Okay so I will steal from my bestest buddy and give my answers to be made fun of...ha ha ha!!! This is really hard to answer since music is such a part of my life. I will do my best.

One song... from your early childhood: "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison. But my Dad was a huge Beatles fan so I can't imagine any other music playing during my early childhood but that.

One song you are associating with your first big love: "Drowning Man" by U2...lost my virginity to it in a basement while his parents were at the Notre Dame game...won't name names.

One song which reminds you of one of your holidays: "Grown-up Christmas List" by anyone really. Michael Buble did a great cover to this!!

One song you like but you have got problems confessing to: "I believe I can Fly" by R.Kelley. I love that song and sing it really loud!! They played it at Julie's dad's funeral....it is what got him through cancer. But R.Kelley has such a bad rep...I really don't tell anyone.

One song which accompanied you, while you where lovesick: "How's it Going to Be" by Third Eye Blind

One song you listened to most often in your life: this is a tough one.....I have listened to alot of U2 songs but when I sit down at the puter...I always start with "New York State of Mind" by Billy Joel. As for U2 it would be "I will Follow"

One song which is your favorite instrumental: I am not sure if this would be instrumental...or jazz but I like "My funny Valentine" by Chris Botti....was 2 feet from him when he played this and I felt it in my toes...but it coulda been the champagne

One song which represents one of you favorite bands: I know it is recent by "Beautiful Day" by U2....they are God's in my eyes and this song rocks and shows their stay power

One song in which you recognize yourself or through which you feel somehow understood: "Where you Lead I will Follow" by Carole King and Louise Goffin. This is actually the theme to the Gilmore Girls and Meg plays it all the time and really if you listen to the lyrics it is me and Meg. We sing this at the top of our lungs all the time.

One song which reminds you to a certain occasion (and the occasion): "Sweet Home Chicago" played by my wedding band at my wedding....dancing with Aim, Juls, Meg and my dad at my wedding. I think that really opened a different side of me to my friends here in Oklahoma.

One song which is the best for you to relax to: "High" by James Blunt or "Fix You" by Coldplay

One song which symbolizes a great time in your life: "I Love Rock N Roll" by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts....the best singing in the radiator song EVER!! Brings me back to my youth and innocence everytime I hear it.

One song which you would dedicate to your best friend: "Hold you in my Arms" by Ray LaMontagne or "Now and Always" by David Gray

One song where you have got the feeling that no one besides you likes it: "The Way you Make me Feel" by Michael Jackson

One song you like because of its lyrics: "40" by U2 it is actually written from psalm 40 from the bible and I think it means a lot to me. Definately play this or speak this at my funeral....just 40.1 to 40.3. Also "Comfortable" by John Mayer....really great song to get someone to sing to you :)

I know that alot of these have 2 songs but really I can't just dedicate 1 song to the questions...since I really feel like I have had 2 lives. My Chicago life and now my Oklahoma life. So there you have it in a nutshell. My life in songs. Thanks Jimmy for the steal.

Funerals, Birthdays and Couganns...Oh My!!

As most of you know Chris' Grandfather finally passed away. It has been a long struggle since his stroke at Griffin's birthday party. He has never fully been the same and really a man that has lived that kind of life deserves better. He died very peacefully and with his daughters surrounding him. His last words before he went into the coma like state he was in was "I love you" to Chris' grandmother. To be together since 1929 to 2006, 77 years...some people aren't lucky enough to live that long let alone have a spouse for that long. Amazing. The funeral went very well. The night before the funeral George, the pastor at the church, came over to go over what we wanted told about Grandpa. Afterwards he said "let's all pray" so we all got up in a circle and held hands. Griffin looked around the room and right in the middle of George's prayer he says "ashes ashes all fall down"....how freaking cute is that!!! Everyone immediately started laughing and George said "that's a first for me". The funeral was great...not to preachy and definitely not depressing. Griffin was a 2 year old and no matter what we did he would not be quiet so around the end of the funeral he said "mimi & pop" so I let him go in the front row and sit with Mimi and Pop planning to get him before they opened the casket...well I was too late. They opened it and in the silence of the funeral home you here "There's my PaPa"...I think everyone cried after hearing that sweet little voice say something so innocent. Then he said "papa's sleeping". So precious. I think all is doing well. Chris' grandmother is getting more involved in the activities at Baptist Village since she doesn't go everyday to Ballard's anymore. I think she will do well. She said she was glad that they were separated (nursing home and assisted living center) because maybe it was God's way of preparing her for this. Who knows....but she is much stronger than we are.

Amongst all this funeral stuff, Chris turned 40. Really not much fan fare since the funeral was the day before. But I had something up my sleeve. Thanks to my mother-in-law making me throw Chris a surprise party. See I hadn't planned on having a party and then she came in and said Russ & Fionnuala are coming for the surprise party!! Bam guess what I through a party. And for the most part he was surprised. I hid it up until we were leaving to go to the club. He looked at me and said "We aren't going to the city are we?" and I knew he knew. The one thing he said was he didn't expect so many people to be there. He was pleased and we had a great time. Kim--you missed stupid human tricks--Lad walking on his hands, Tina & Kelly doing yoga moves and Kasey doing the splits...pretty impressive really. Russ did a great presentation that I think everyone enjoyed and really it wasn't to ugly to Chris...there was a great pic of Chris in the Brokeback Mountain movie picture. Funny. I also liked the enemy reference and bam there is Joe's picture with the crashed porsche. He is really talented with that kind of stuff.

Now for my biggest stress of the moment....Cougann tryouts!!! They are 3 weeks away. The shitty thing is her play is that week also...so she will be pretty slammed...performances all that week!! Luckily she really doesn't have a line in the play so that won't be bad...but alot of added stress on her. Oh yeah, and my dad will be here that weekend. So really if she doesn't make it she will be embarrassed not only in front of us, but her grandfather too! Tryout is Friday March 31st and I guess she finds out that night. I can just see if she doesn't make it and Chloe does...Chloe being a bitch to her. I gotta say if she is I will put my momma pants on and go off. I mean really what kind of a friend would do that!! Part of me knows that she will make it. She has really busted her ass this year with grades and has all As and Bs with maybe one C in Algebra...but come on what girl wouldn't have a C in Algebra. And really she has had 10 years of dance. But if she doesn't I am really worried that because Ada is so clique happy that she will maybe go down a different path. I guess alot of my childhood is coming to the surface. I tried out for cheerleading with all my friends and they all made it...I didn't. Because they were always so busy I hung around different people and went down the wrong path...drugs, alcohol, parties and Bam became preggers at 18. I know that just because it happened to me doesn't mean Meg's life will go that way...but I know she is so influenced by her friends....definately a follower...so if her friends become busy who knows what path she will take. She tells me if she doesn't make it she will just be a Ruff Rider...a pep squad kinda thing in the stands. I know she will handle the rejection better than me...or at least that is how she is acting. God I hope she makes it!!!

Well I guess that is enough rambling for now. I hope all is doing well in your parts.....